Is marriage really a good thing? Are humans meant to be monogamous? Can two people really fall in love and have a relationship that lasts? If you were to listen to many of today’s mainstream media outlets and their messages the answer would be a resounding “no.”
Marriage takes work and it’s not always about you. It’s not all sunshine and rainbows. It’s quite the opposite of today’s “feel good” culture and “look out for yourself” mindset. It may require work but it’s well worth the effort.
Marriage isn’t a good thing. It’s a great thing!
When you choose to get married you’re deeply in love with someone (hopefully) you’ve come to know and understand. However, getting to know the real person and their genuine heart takes years. This involves going through life’s experiences together. Both partners will change over the years. Wedding day is just the beginning of a lifelong journey.
Marriage is a commitment to love one another, grow together, and support the other through the years.
Here are five reasons why marriage is the best..
You live with the most inspiring person. To see the total, selfless, and committed love my wife has for our family is truly inspirational. You think you know someone in your late teens and early 20’s, but you really know someone (and their true heart) when you reach your early 30’s. Through marriage you witness what work, home, and life balance is. My wife makes it look easy, but it’s not. I’m one lucky dude. She works tirelessly (in a very demanding profession) and then comes home to me and two wild boys. She cares for, nurtures, supports, and loves us to no end. If that’s not inspiring, I don’t know what is.
You experience true love and forgiveness. You don’t give up just because something is difficult or uncomfortable. Marriage will offer plenty of opportunities to annoy, upset, anger, and even hurt someone. But you don’t give up on someone you love when times get tough. In a healthy marriage you accept your partner for who they are, not someone you wish for them to be. Above all friendship is what got you there, and it’s what will allow you to stay on this journey together. You need people in your life that will love you and hold you accountable. Your spouse should be that person. True love is not blind. It is seeing your partner for who they are, accepting their shortcomings, forgiving them for their mistakes, and loving them deeply.
You have someone to grow old with. The beautiful thing about marriage is you always have one person who has your back. Marriage allows for individual growth, but the real joy is growing together with your spouse. In order to do this you need peace with your past, understanding of who you are now, and a vision for yourself and family. There are different seasons of life; some good, some bad, and some great. What makes the journey beautiful is having someone to experience and share the highs and lows with. You never have to be alone. What good is life if you can’t share it with someone you love?
You continue to fall in love. The reasons why you love your spouse 10 years into marriage won’t be the exact same as your wedding day. And that’s okay. That’s the way it should be. If you’re the same person in your mid-30’s as you were in your mid-20’s, you’ve wasted a decade. As stated above, marriage is about growth, individually and together. One of the real joys is traveling together, having great friends, making new friends, and experiencing all the world has to offer with your best friend. My wife continues to amaze me. We’ve been married almost nine years and I love her more than the day I saw her walk down that aisle. She’s not the same person as our wedding day, nor am I. We’re better versions of our 20 year-old selves. Nothing has made me love and appreciate her more than her devout and selfless love for our two boys. The best thing I can do repay her is to love her deeply and model what a real husband should be for my sons.
Your children. This will be the most challenging and rewarding part of your marriage. In some weird way, your kids are the best parts of you and your spouse combined. Having someone help you raise and watch your children grow with is such a blessing. Taking family trips, playing outside, cuddling on couches, and sharing laughter are my favorite family memories. The love you share and express through marriage will be passed onto your children. In those (sometimes rare) moments when your children express their genuine love for each other, your heart melts. And there’s nothing better than having your child give you a hug and a kiss and say, “I Love You.” Raising children is a challenge and to have someone like my wife beside me means the world to me. This monumental responsibility is life’s greatest reward. It’s our legacy.
If you’re married share what makes your marriage great. Tag your spouse with this post, add how long you’ve been married for, and what’s the best part of it for you.
As always, thanks for reading, have a great week, and be an RGP today!
Coach Elmendorf is available to speak to your team, group, or organization. Message him for details.